A Few Pics from NYC

About My Spizzo

i used to have a myspace ... back when myspace was new ... i was in first 30,000 to have an account ... i don't know if i should be proud of that or what ... anyway i deleted that thing a while back but this is the excerpt from the about me section .... i always wondered how they expected you to write about yourself ... as you can see i thought it was really a joke ... but this is not too far from the truth ... ok here it is ...

i got issues ... skeletons in the closet ... a checkered past ... a bad rep ... i'm nothing but trouble ... i'm always up to something ... people say i'm no good ... i can't make up my mind ever ... i go out too much ... i wear the same old greasy hat everyday ... i might be crazy ... i take my med's with a shot of grey goose ... my therapy is going nowhere ... i like to hit happy hour at El Torito before i go to my AA meetings ... wanna bet if ill make it to gamblers anonymous today? ... i like to take long walks off short piers ... i play with fire ... i read chain letters just to break them ... i drive 50 MPH in the fast lane ... i'm that one guy that just beats you to the drive thru and takes forever to order stuff ... i make it a point to have more then 10 items at the express check out line ... i like to stop in the middle of the aisle at costco for no reason ... i substitute then for than and your for you're so what? i told you im crazy ... i'm known to smash peoples bread in the check out line at the grocery store ... sometimes i get a piece of dried up glue and hang it out my nose so it looks like a booger. then i go around at work to see who is going to tell me like "yo! you got a booger hanging out your nose!" i know who my real friends are now! ... like i said crazy ...

Royale with Cheese part Duex

So fresh from the East Coast ... Boston, NYC ... a quick stint in Vermont ... yes Vermont folks but I actually had a great time ... anyway ... as i mentioned before ... there are the subtle differences between east coast west coast culture ... for instance ... Vermont has free Internet at their roadside rest areas .... NO bathrooms sometimes, but free Internet none the less(go figure)! Of course there are the differences that are obvious ... weather ... a summer in SF CA is pretty damn cold at night ... i always bring a jacket where ever i go ... i just leave it in the trunk ... rain in the summer in the Bay is quite rare ... it rains a lot back east over the summer ... and its still hot as crap ... anyway, so now to the heart of the matter ... the "guts" of this ... so to speak ... ok i never really noticed, but while i was in Vermont i had a bad case of stomach gurgles(The precursor to MUDDBUTT) ... so here i am in a steak house in Vermont, celebrating my brothers Masters Degree, and BLAM it's on me like a crack head is on his dealer when the 1st and 15th rolls around ... I am hurting ... so i make a run on the men's restroom like a state worker making a run on the bank trying to cash a CA state IOU ... time seems to slow down ... picture this (cue the slow motion) bathroom stall door kicked down ... one hand on my belt buckle one hand reaching for the toilet seat covers ... spin move all in one motion slam closed the stall door ... toilet seat cover in one hand ... slides it into to place ... when the sudden realization ... NO toilet seat covers!!! NOOOOOOOOO(in slow motion ... ceiling cam close up slowly pulls out) frantically i begin to engineer some protection out of TP ... my butt cheeks thank me for winning this battle but my insides are slowly letting me know that the war will be lost ... ill spare you the gory details ... (as if this wasn't detailed enough) ... the point i am trying to make is that even in the shittiest(haha no pun intended) of bathrooms in CA ... i am talking total hole in the wall dive bar .. to porta potty ... there are some damn toilet seat covers!!!! East coast is it too much to ask for some damn free toilet seat covers!?!?!?! to add insult to injury i ask the people in my party if they know of this hygiene faux pas, and much to my chagrin ... i guess it was common knowledge that there are no toilet seat covers on the east coast!!! ... i know that there are few who read this blog ... but to those fateful that do ... let this be a lesson to you and a warning ... this knowledge may save your ass (again no pun intended) ... bring your own toilet seat covers when you go to NYC ... or just find a CA based company over there and hijack some ... i happened upon a cache inside the apple store ...

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"when in doubt ... the cosmos will send you all the signs you need to put you back on track ... you just need to be brave enough to read them"

Wino Blues

sangria sangria

why do you haunt me so

you quench my every desire

i see my eyes

in your rogue

as i bring you to my lips

and taste the fruit of your

full bodied goodness

i relish the ice cold

passion ... goose bumps

anticipation ... savoring

intoxication

but wait

no

how dare you

you are the bane of my fantasy

empty

carafe